Which Parents Are Seated First at a Wedding?

It really depends. In the past it was usual for the father of the bride to be seated near the bride’s in a double row. This is still the case in some ceremonies and is usually done by one of the parents of the groom and his bride’s next to each other. But traditionally, the bride’s parents sit together first and then the groom and his bride next.

There are exceptions to this though and it’s not just the case of whose turn it is. At some weddings the bride’s parents may sit two or three seats down from her in the same room. This is particularly common at social events such as dinner parties or the bridal shower. At other times the bride and groom’s families may sit in different rooms but not necessarily adjacent to one another. Which parents are seated first at a wedding?

There are several theories about the order of placement for the first couple at a wedding. Some say it’s a matter of traditional precedence which goes back to the time when the family of the bride fed the poor during the wedding. If this is true, the first seat might have been reserved for the oldest daughter. Others say it’s based on when the first child was born. The child who was “first born” should be sitting with her parents.

Another argument is that the family of the groom should sit next to the bride’s parents. This has some merit. It’s not uncommon for the groom to be sitting with his own parents. But if the parents of the groom are divorced or not related to the bride, they may not be sitting next to each other. This would depend on whether the wedding is informal or formal.

The traditional placement for the first parents at a wedding is, of course, at the head table. But that parents are seated first at a wedding? Sometimes it depends on the relationship between the bride and the groom. If they’re good friends, they may sit together. If they’re just best friends, they’ll be seated next to each other.

There’s one more question you need to ask yourself when thinking about which parents are seated first at a wedding. What’s the family style? At some weddings (not all), the family style is reversed. The bride is seated next to the groom. At other weddings, the family style is the opposite. The bride is usually seated beside her future husband.

If the bride and groom are indeed best friends, then the best person to sit next to them will almost always be their children. But if they’re not related, then the child to be seated first should ideally be someone from the family who is not also a blood relative. For example, the child who is sitting next to the best man could be his brother or cousin.

The child to be seated first doesn’t have to necessarily be the child of the bride or groom. It might simply be someone who is close to the two families. And yes, in some cases it might be someone from the family that does not have an immediate relationship with either the bride or the groom. So, just as the bride and groom need to decide which wedding ceremony to use, the children must also make sure whose wedding ceremony they will be going to.

Of course, some weddings will have a tiered list. Then, depending on how much money you have budgeted for the wedding, the names of the guests will be announced one at a time. You’ll then have a clearer idea as to whose wedding ceremony is this?

Some couples will have their names announced first. This may seem odd, but it’s often done for logistical reasons. It might be that only a select few are able to attend the wedding, so announcing their name’s first allows those persons to join the wedding party before the other guests. Or, it may be that the couple wishes to give their guests a little bit of a break from their own wedding day, and wishes to give them a chance to catch up on their lives before their marriage. Whatever the case, if their names aren’t being announced first, the invitees will almost always know whose wedding ceremony is this.

Then, as you’ve discussed the topic of whose wedding ceremony is this? you can decide whether or not to have a traditional wedding, one in a church, with just one minister. Or, you might be able to have your wedding in a more nontraditional venue, like a banquet hall or hotel ballroom. Just make sure to make advance plans to be there when it’s all said and done!